Everybody's got a centaur?

I was just reading something that advised me to "Find my center, take a deep breath, and enjoy." Which of course, I read as "Find my centaur."  I would like to! Any suggestions of where I ought to look? Where does one find a centaur? Next question: Do I want a centaur??? What would I do with one? I guess it would depend a lot on how intelligent they are. If they're like the centaurs in Ella Enchanted, a centaur would make a good pet. If they're like the ones in Harry Potter, a centaur would just tell me something cryptic and then leave because, you know, I'm a human, and who needs that? If they're like the (bad) centaurs in Watersmeet, a book I just read, the centaur would capture me, torture me, and try to bite off my toes. I do not want to find that kind of centaur. Although I will give props to Watersmeet for having lady centaurs. Have you ever noticed that the centaurs are always men? I think we all know why, but still, it's pretty sexist. Just get those lady centaurs a shirt! And while we're at it, shouldn't the man centaurs start wearing shirts, too? Trust me world, some things should never be shirtless in public, for the good of us all.

It would be pretty awesome to have a faithful centaur companion, like a sidekick who was also half horse, if he or she were nice, and also cool, and wanted to be my friend. Because hopefully they might give me rides, and it would be good to be able to finally ask my centaur friend if it's weird to be a centaur. Do they feel kinship with horses? With humans? Both? Neither? Do they have to sleep standing up? If so, doesn't that make their human half tired? It's hard to sleep in a upright position. Also, it's kind of a bummer that they can't ride in cars or on airplanes or anything. What if they want to see the world? Do they have to gallop the whole way?

Anyhow, the point of this story is, I clearly have an overactive imagination and possibly too much time on my hands. And the need to share these things with other people. So there you go! Centaurs!