The Black Lung is Going on an Adventure! Part 1: Jet lag+Airports= Whatever the tired version of Hanger is

Friends, it's true. I went on vacation again, and not to Europe this time! Nay, this time, The Black Lung went to visit her friend Leah in New Zealand! Many of my friends have moved away in the past couple of years (it is lame, please stop doing that), but only one has been generous enough to move to a place that I have always (since the Fellowship of the Ring movie came out) wanted to visit.

Boh says, "Why you want to leave me???"

I decided pretty last minute (September, I think) that I wanted to go visit her, mostly because another vacation I had wanted to take wasn't going to work out. I had originally thought of going next year, but this year, I had the time and I had the money, so I decided to go for it. Of course, it's a pretty pricey flight, and almost immediately after I booked it, things started to go wrong. First, a week or two after I got my ticket, when I was getting a new tire that turned into two new tires, the techs asked if I wanted them to check why my brake light in the car was on. Sure thing! Except it turns out that instead of just two new tires, I also needed new brakes! Then a week or two after that, my washing machine broke, and I had to get a new one. Then, shortly after that, I started having all the tooth pain, and I ended up getting a root canal. Basically, by the time it was go time, I had none of the money I thought I had. So, vacation had better be pretty fun, because I would never be able to afford to do anything again.

First things first-New Zealand is far away. There's not really a fast way to get there, and somehow, I chose a slow way. Basically, at least from this side of the country, the way to get there is to take a flight from LA. So first you have to get to LA, and if you book through a travel site, you may accidentally get yourself a 10+ hours layover. Next time (in a couple of years when I build my moneys back up), I will separately book a flight to LA to get that time down. Because there is nothing to do in the airport for that long, and I'm not adventurous enough to go into the city by myself with only that long to explore. It was especially irritating because I had to leave Baltimore very early in the morning, and I didn't sleep well the night before, and I couldn't sleep at the airport because I didn't want to be murdered and I wanted to be able to sleep on the plane. I did a lot of walking around, and a lot of reading (I finally got to read this book written by my bro-in-law Dale, and I can truly recommend it. It was very fun), some watching of Netflix (I'm super grateful for the download shows option, because airport internet is the worst. Also the worst? Archie from Riverdale, which is the show I watched). I thought about getting a massage, but they are so expensive! (See above, re: me having no money) I really think that airports ought to invest in fun things to do, not just things to buy. I would have given my left shoe for a movie theater.

The only nice thing about early morning airport trips. Wowza! 

My flight to New Zealand finally left at about 10:00 at night, and here we had some good news. First, there was no one sitting next to me! That meant that I could basically curl up into a tiny ball and use both seats for sleeping. Which I totally did. Second, Air New Zealand is pretty darn nice. Truthfully, all international flights are nicer than domestic flights, probably because they know you're stuck on them for a very long time and they want to keep you happy if they can. This was the longest flight I've ever been on (almost 13 hours). I will admit that they did one thing that irritated me. About 2 hours after we got on the plane (ie-long enough for me to be taking a pretty good nap, because at this point it was 3 in the morning, Baltimore time), they came around and gave us all dinner. Those jerks! It was actually very nice to have some dinner, except that I had already eaten dinner and it was 3 in the morning. But I very much appreciated that food because by the time they served breakfast, I was supa hungry! Another nice thing about international flights is that they've got the little tv on the back of the seat in front of you and tons of stuff that you can watch. This is especially nice because, at that point, I was way too tired to read anything coherently. I ended up watching a really hilarious show called Trial and Error about a lawyer's first murder trial. I know that doesn't sound hilarious, but I laughed a whole heck of a lot.

Still, by the time I got to Auckland, I was whatever is the tired version of hangry, and I was ready for my domestic flight to Palmerston North, where Leah lives. Also, I was uber gross from travelling so much and wearing the same outfit for like 28 hours. I should explain about the domestic flights in New Zealand. There's a domestic terminal in the big international airport that has puddle jumpers that fly all over the country to tiny little airports. Which is very convenient, since no one wants to drive 6 hours to get to Auckland when they can fly for 1 hour instead. Unfortunately, my layover at that airport was super short, and by the time I made it all the way to the domestic terminal (it is far!), it was too late for me and my flight. I got rescheduled for one a couple of hours later, and I was distraught. The airline employee felt so bad for me and my frazzled self that she gave me a voucher to get a sandwich at Subway. So that was my first foreign meal. But I did get an L&P soda for my drink (I for reals thought it was lemonade and it's not, and I loved it) and that's very New Zealandy. 

Anywho, I at last made it to Palmy (that's what they call it, I am legit) and my wonderful friend was there, and she didn't even care that I just wanted to shower and take a really long nap. After my nap, she showed me around her town. I, like a dum-dum, wore flip flops because it was warm (they are opposite seasons to us down there) and because I couldn't bear to put shoes back on, but it was a mistake! By the time we got back to her house, I had the foot pain. Anywho, we saw her work, got some cupcakes, went grocery shopping for our roadtrip (side note-the grocery store we went to is called Countdown, and if you're thinking, "I bet Meredith sang Final Countdown every time they went to the store," you are correct), went to a museum, and most importantly, went to the library! Leah has been telling me good things about the library there since she first moved, and she was right. It's very, very cool. The building looks like it might have originally been some sort of warehouse that was converted into a library. They have a whole Maori heritage floor! They had DVDs of Poldark on display, which seemed especially advantageous since I had just been telling her about it. Basically, it's seems like a cool place to work. 

I'm in front of the library! I really know how to vacation.

For some reason, this is the only picture I have at the museum, and I am in a giant water pipe. Because reasons.

After that, we went and got pizza and the most crazy delicious donuts from a place called, I am not joking, Hell Pizza. I think the donuts were called Unholy Donuts? Bascially they are rectangular and filled with different kinds of chocolate (I had dark chocolate, obvs.) and covered with cinnamon sugar. Ugh, I want one right now. We ate, and tried to watch a movie and make a travel playlist, but I basically fell asleep by 8:30. Which was OK, because the next morning, we had adventures to get to! 

Next time, on The Black Lung-I kind of fulfill my high school destiny, but Orlando Bloom as Legolas, circa 2001, is not there. Alas.