The Black Lung Talks Real Good and Stuff. Part 6: Dublin, it's not me, it's you.

Unless otherwise noted, all photo credits go to Niki Erickson, an awesome photographer, a fantastic friend, and a really top notch traveling companion. Thanks, Niki!

Previously, on The Black Lung...we were in Dingle. Huzzah! It was great, and if you only get to go to one place in Ireland, that's what I'd recommend. Of course, it's pretty isolated, so I have no idea how you'd get there and bypass everything else, but there you go. So, with heavy hearts, we said farewell to Dingle. This is when I almost killed that biker. Sorry, guy!

At Blarney Castle. If we'd realized how extensive the grounds were, we would have budgeted in more time. Knowledge is Power.

 

Our first stop was Blarney Castle, home of the Blarney Stone. The basic Blarney Stone story is that if you kiss it, you'll be an eloquent speaker. According to the myth, this is either because the Blarney Stone is part of the Stone of Destiny (which I mentioned in my post about Scotland), or maybe because of a witch who was drowned, or saved from drowning, or a pagan goddess giving someone advice for a court date. It was unclear. In any case, since this tradition started, probably in the late 1700s, millions of people have kissed the Blarney Stone.

 View from the top. Climbing the skinny, windy stairs to get to the top of Blarney Castle is almost scarier than actually kissing the stone. Almost.

Before we went, I really had no idea what this entailed. The Stone is on the highest level of Blarney Castle (which is in ruins, bt-dubs, just to make it scarier). The internet assures me that the castle is 90 feet tall, so that's about how high you are. You have to lie down on your back and stick your upper body out of a hole and then move your head down and over to kiss the stone. If you have good eyesight, you can see the ground far, far below. If you have taken your glasses off so you won't lose them out the hole, like I did, you can only see enough to know that one false move and you'll be a goner. There's a man that holds onto your legs, and there are iron bars to hold onto, but I still felt like I might die. I was very dizzy for a few minutes afterward. It's also disgusting. There are several stones in the hole, and the easiest way to figure out where to kiss is to look for the lipstick marks. Seriously, if Niki hadn't already been sick, I would have thought I got my post-vacation illness from the Blarney Stone. Still, pretty cool to say I've done it, even if it hasn't noticeably improved my eloquence yet. I'm pretty sure that living in Baltimore is working hard to counteract any gift of gab I may have received in Ireland.

 People waiting to kiss the Blarney Stone. You can see just how high we really were/how ruined the castle really is. There's an actual picture of me kissing the stone, but I had to pay 10 Euros for it, so you'll have to see it in person.

 The Hole from the outside. That white patch near the top of the wall is what you're leaning  out of, backwards and upside down.

Aside from the Blarney Stone itself, Blarney Castle also has a lot more to offer. The grounds are beautiful, and we walked through a lot of beautiful gardens. They also have a creepy cave/tunnel system under the castle that was possibly used by inhabitants to escape the grounds in times of war. I went a little way into the caves, and they were dark, damp, and short. I think if I needed to escape from anyone using those caves, it would be a toss-up as to what would actually kill me: starvation, being captured, panic attacks from claustrophobia, or accidentally braining myself on the low-hanging rocks.

Right inside the creepy caves. A few steps further in, and there's no sunlight anymore. The horror!

 

Niki in a giant tree on the Blarney grounds. The grounds were so pretty!

 

One of my favorite part of the grounds was the poison garden. At first we thought it was a playground, because some of the poisonous plants were covered by what looked like monkey bars. But that's just to keep you from getting too close! There were also plants that warned you not to sniff them, and super fun things like Deadly Nightshade and Wolfsbane. Then they surprised everyone by also having tobacco plants and talking about how smoking is poison. POISON!!! Pretty fantastic stuff.

Go Cougars!

 

After we left Blarney Castle, we went to Cobh, which is the last port the Titanic stopped at before it's ill-fated maiden voyage. It was a disappointment, mostly because we went to the wrong place. If you ever go, make sure you go to the Queenstown Heritage Center, which we've heard good things about, and not the Titanic Experience, which sounds legit but is hecka boring. Trust us. And then we tried to go to Subway and I almost got in a fight with some workers because they were really dumb, but they thought that I was the really dumb one. How rude! I did not get in a fight with them because I am  mature, but it was a disappointing afternoon to say the least.

That night, we stayed in Waterford Castle. So pretty and fancy. It's on it's own island! You have to take a ferry to get there! It's historic! They have golfing! Also, the fanciest toilet in the world, with pretty pictures painted on the outside and the inside (ew!). The one terrible thing about staying there was that I could not figure out how to make the shower cooler, and I almost passed out because it was so hot and steamy in the bathroom. The best thing about staying there (aside from it being a castle on a island, of course) was the breakfast. So good! I got porridge, and I loved it so much that I've tried to recreate the experience since I got home. The closest I've gotten is Irish Oatmeal with a little bit of heavy cream stirred in. Delish. It's also pretty good without the heavy cream though,  in case you don't want to have a heart attack from eating breakfast.

 You can't really tell from this picture, but there are gargoyles up there. :D

 Wheeeee!!! For some reason, I felt compelled to swing on a fancy gate while exploring the island. Probably because I'm really mature. Remember how I didn't fight those Subway people?

The next morning, we went to the Waterford Crystal showroom, which is kind of insane. The first thing we saw was a giant crystal bear which cost 40,000 Euros! A Euro was about the equivalent of $1.30 when we were there, which basically means that it was a freakin' expensive bear. They had some cheaper stuff (Niki got a great bowl for a very reasonable price), but there were extremely extravagant and insanely expensive things all over the showroom. My favorite was the Cinderella coach and horses, which were 30,000 Euros. My other favorite thing was the crystal seahorse brooches all the employees wore, but those weren't for sale. Sad face. I would have bought one and worn it every time I wanted to look fancy.

 

 Why no picture of the crystal bear??? Seriously though, anyone want to lend me about $40,000 so I can get this?

After we left Waterford, we went to Dublin, which was the great disappointment of our vacation. Seriously, it was terrible. Luckily, we had only planned to stay there for part of one day, so we didn't have to suffer through it for long. First problem we encountered-no one in Dublin knows how to drive or be a pedestrian. Honestly, only divine intervention kept us from killing or being killed on the roads of Dublin. Never try to drive there. Not really sure if there's good public transportation, but almost anything would be better than driving. Second problem, it was really dirty. Honestly much grosser than London. Third problem, extreme rudeness. Our one big plan for Dublin was to see the Book of Kells, which is in Trinity Library. The Book of Kells is legitimately amazing, and I would have very much enjoyed seeing it, but both Niki and I were pushed (pushed!!!) multiple times, especially by this older lady, who is really lucky that she didn't leave with a black eye. But even though she was the worst offender, pretty much all the tourists were rude and the employees were unhelpful. If I was in charge, things would run much better, because there would be rules, and they would be enforced! Anyhow, Trinity College Library is amazing, and you should try to go at a time when literally no one else is there.

 

 The long room in the Trinity College Library. So amazing. I wanted to touch everything! But we were allowed to touch nothing.

 Don't be fooled by this picture of a street musician on a charming cobblestone road. Dublin was evil. Evil I say!

After our harrowing experiences in Dublin, we decided to forgo our original plan of going to a pub and hearing Irish music in the evening. Instead, we stayed in our hotel room all night and watched American television. It was a dark time indeed. But it gets worse! The next morning, our plan was to catch the ferry to Wales, thus ending our time in Ireland. But alas, we went to the wrong port, missed the ferry, and had to wait five hours to catch the next one! It was super frustrating. First, we drove to the wrong port. Then we drove to the right port (at least a 45 minute drive). Then we had to go back to the first port (another 45 minute drive), because that's where the next ferry was sailing from. And then we ending up hanging out in the waiting room at the port for a couple of hours. To top it all off, it wasn't the same ferry company that we used on our way to Ireland, and there was a definite difference in quality and comfort. Also, the sea was super choppy, so even though we both took Dramamine, Niki and I got really, really sea sick. And we had to miss 5 quality hours in Wales, which turned out to be one of our favorite places of vacation.

To be continued...with less whining.

Next time-the thrilling conclusion of the Adventures of the Black Lung!

The Black Lung Meets Fungie the Dolphin! Part 5: Dingle All the Way

Unless otherwise noted, all photo credits go to Niki Erickson, an awesome photographer, a fantastic friend, and a really top notch traveling companion. Thanks, Niki!

Yes, I really did just make you read a terrible pun. I'm sorry? JK, I'm really proud of myself.

Anywho, Dingle. It's a really quaint little town on the Dingle Pennisula on the west coast of Ireland. I know that quaint is a stupid word, and I hate myself for using it, but f'reals, this town. Tiny, adorable shops, brightly colored houses along the bay, bearded chefs, dolphins. But I am getting ahead of myself.

 View from the bay. Love those colored houses.

We stayed in a great hotel on Main Street in Dingle. First reason I loved it-we stayed there two nights in a row. I know there's a lot to be said for marathon vacationing, but sleeping in the same bed twice was such a pleasure. Also, they had great breakfasts there. They had the breakfast buffet, which included an assortment of fancy cheeses (which is genius. I want fancy cheeses for breakfast all the time now). And then you could also order off the menu, and if you got the waffles, they brought you syrup in the tiniest, cutest pitcher. We joked about stealing them as souvenirs, they were that cute. Another thing to love about breakfast was the American family who was seated at the next table over. Clearly the parents, who were pretty conservative, middle class looking people, were trying mightily to relate to their son, who has only taken a break from occupying Wall  Street in order to educate his parents about the hypocrisy of capitalism. I can also imagine him sitting in a coffee shop, writing sad poetry and feeling misunderstood. Needless to say, they were very entertaining.

Dingle Main Street. Look how cute it is!

 

Also great about our hotel-the guy who worked there was super helpful. The first thing he did when we got there was give us a map of town with attractions and restaurants highlighted. He asked us what we planned on doing and gave us (really helpful) suggestions to have a more awesome stay. And he told us which restaurant in town was his favorite, and unlike that lady in Edinburgh, he actually knew what he was talking about. It was an awesome restaurant, with delicious food. Also, the chef, who was a cute redhead with a beard (!!!) came out of the kitchen and asked us if we liked our food! I felt pretty fancy. But the best thing about the restaurant was what they put on all the desserts-chocolate pop rocks. Honestly, they were amazing! And chocolatey! And they popped! It turns out that Sticky Toffee Pudding with chocolate pop rocks is delightful.

We saw this dog riding a donkey near the harbor. Very mysterious/amazing.

 

The next day we explored Dingle, the bay, and the peninsula. Apparently, there is a Bottlenose Dolphin (now named Fungie, which is a terribad name, guys) that has lived in Dingle Bay since 1983! That's as many years as I've lived on planet Earth. According to the interwebs, the good people of Dingle don't give him awesome snacks to make him stay or anything. He just likes it. We also likes it, so we went on a Fungie Dolphin tour of the bay. You really can't lose, because if you don't see Fungie, you don't have to pay. But we totally saw him! A lot! He was swimming right by our boat for 15 minutes or so of the hour and a half boat ride. So awesome. We love you, Fungie! He's also ginormous. I never knew that dolphins got so big. We read that dolphins can live up to 40 years, so I hope that Fungie is in the bay for years to come.

Moi, avec the Fungie statue. I think I'm surfing.

 

 Eeeeeee! There he is!

He didn't jump (he is at least 30 years old, after all), but he did come out of the water a lot. 

 

My favorite was when Fungie swam really close to the surface like this. He's so cool.

 

After we saw Fungie, we drove around the peninsula on Slea Head Drive. The Drive is something like 37 miles long, and in 5 hours or so driving, I think we made it 12 miles. There was so much to do and so much to see! We went to several museums, including this awesome prehistoric Ireland museum, where we saw a wooly mammoth skull and I bought my super fantastic dragon. We also went to some potato famine houses. The man who worked there had the thickest accent of anyone we met on vacation. I really thought he wasn't speaking English at first. He had to do a lot of gesturing for us to understand him. And then when we got back from the famine huts, he was gone! It was very mysterious. He was probably a ghost. The other museum we went to was about the Blasket Islands, a group of islands a few miles off the coast. No one has lived there since the 1950s, but up until that point, the people who lived there had been basically an unchanged society for hundreds of years. It was very interesting, but Niki totally fell asleep while we were there. :)

 

Ta da! The guy who ran this museum/best gift shop ever was American. Why don't I live in Dingle? I'm an American!

Touring the famine huts, no big d...HOLY CRAP WHAT IS THAT???? Yes, the famine huts went for nightmare inducing rather than realistic.

One of the views from Slea Head Drive. These rock walls were all over Ireland, even up mountainsides. They really want you to know that this is their land.

 

The other reason it took us 5 hours to go 12 miles was because everything was beautiful. We kept thinking it couldn't get more beautiful, but as soon as we rounded the next bend, we were proven wrong. The views were stunning. Unfortunately, when we came out of the last museum, it had gotten really foggy, so we basically drove the last 25 miles in half an hour. Nothing to see, nothing to do (the museums were closed by then). Still really pretty, though. And then we went to eat at another really good restaurant. That hotel guy knew what he was talking about. My favorite thing about 2nd day restaurant was that I wanted my burger well done, and it was actually well done! Not just cooked around the edges. C'mon, America. Get it together! Also great was the fact that the weather had started misting. Not really rain, although we got pretty wet, just tiny little water droplets hanging out in the air. I've never see weather like it anywhere else.

 Slea Head Drive. Pictures don't do it justice.

After that, we planned to go to a pub to hear some real Irish music, but Niki was sick, so we went back to our hotel and she basically slept for 13 hours. I got the same disease right when we got home, so I know exactly how she felt. Still, even with the black lung (note the absence of capital letters) afflicting Niki, Dingle was still a definite vacation highlight.

Next time, on The Black Lung...We get some germs and do not have a great time in Dublin.

To Be Continued...

The Black Lung is Melting! Melting! Part 4: I find out how the Emerald Isle became so green (hint-it's the rain).

Unless otherwise noted, all photo credits go to Niki Erickson, an awesome photographer, a fantastic friend, and a really top notch traveling companion. Thanks, Niki!


Previously, on The Black Lung: Scotland! Also, I forgot to mention something important. While we were in Skye, we say a sign for a place (?) called Totescore. We spent a while debating on the pronunciation, but eventually decided that no matter what it really was, now it was an awesome part of our vocabulary. For example, "Our vacation was totescore amazing." Or, "That guy had a totescore intense accent, and I couldn't tell what he was saying."

Moving on, as if we ever really could, the morning after we slept in a haunted, smoke-riddled castle, we took the car ferry  to Northern Ireland. I was really concerned about seasickness, but I took some Dramamine and was fine. Mostly I took naps, read a book, and ate some Kinder Bueno, my favorite candy of vacation. Mmm...Kinder Bueno. I have a few left that I've been hoarding since I got home, and now I want one.

The whole time we were crossing the Irish Sea and when we got to Northern Ireland, it was raining cats and dogs. It was really the only day of vacation that we had really awful, typically British weather. And it was the only day that my raincoat wasn't sufficient to keep me dry. I was wet up to the knees, and I think that water actually got under my raincoat through the sleeve's and neck hole. It was kinda miserable, even though we did awesome stuff that day.

The first place we went was called The Dark Hedges. It's this stretch of road where some twisty trees have grown up and made a tunnel over the road. Even though we got soaked, I think that the rain actually made it look cooler. We met a random Irish guy who was there taking lots of pictures. We didn't blame him at all. It's another place that's so beautiful it seems unreal.

 The Dark Hedges. They were legitimately dark, and not just because it was raining.

Next we went to Giant's Causeway. I love Giant's Causeway! It's a very cool geologic formation on the coast. There are about 40,000 interlocking basalt columns. Obviously we now know that they were caused by a volcano, but back in the day, people were totally amazed/confused by them. So there are a lot of interesting legends about the giant Finn MacCool living there. I had heard many legends about Finn MacCool before, so I loved seeing the place that inspired those legends. I also really liked Giant's Causeway because there's a free audio tour that's included with admission! I learned some interesting history and legends from it. In spite how wet we were, this was still one of my favorite places of vacation.

 I'm not shiny. It was just that wet.

Niki was much braver than me. I was afraid to go out on the slippery rocks.

That's me in the red! I think the hill in the background might be one of the Giant's Haystacks.

 I took this one myself. Pretty impressive, no? You can see The Giant's Chimney and the Giant's Granny in the background. This is how the weather looked all day.

That night, we stayed at Troy Hall, a really beautiful B&B in Londonderry. I think it was the prettiest place that we stayed. Also, it's the place where we had a full Irish breakfast. We figured we should try it at least once. Never again. Grody to the max, you guys. Some of it is pretty normal-fried eggs, sausage, and weird bacon (none of the bacon there was crispy, so it was more like ham). And some tomatoes. And potato bread and Irish soda bread, which were by far the best part of breakfast. So amazingly delicious. But breakfast also came with baked beans (weird) and with Black Pudding and White Pudding. I won't tell you what those are. You can look it up if you want. But I will tell you that they are disgusting, and I have no idea why people eat them.

What happened after we left Troy Hall was the great failure of our vacation-we tried to go to church, but we never found it. The internet assures us that there is an LDS congregation that meets less than two miles from where we were staying, but we sure couldn't see it. We drove up and down that street for about 45 minutes before finally giving up in despair. No church for us. We had our own Sunday meeting later that night when I read an extra talk from General Conference to us. Sad stuff.

So instead of going to church, we went to Free Derry. It was very eerie. It's the sight of a lot on conflict with the British army in the late '60s, early '70s and where Bloody Sunday happened. There are monuments for the victims of Bloody Sunday as well as for people who died on hunger strike in prison. There's also graffiti everywhere, IRA tags, and demands to release political prisoners. The thing that was saddest to me was how young the hunger strikers and the Bloody Sunday victims all were. It's hard to believe how recently this happened.

Free Derry. There were murals depicting the violence all around this neighborhood.

 

After we left Londonderry, we headed south to the Belleek Pottery Factory. Unfortunately, since it was the weekend we couldn't do the tour, but I've heard it's awesome. We did get to see the museum and the showroom, which were both very cool. I didn't really know much about Belleek before, but their pottery is beautiful. They're especially well known for their pottery baskets, which are insanely detailed. It's hard to believe they're actually pottery.

We spent the rest of Sunday in Sligo, because Niki's pen pal lives there. It was pretty cool to get an insider's view of an Irish town. He took us to Sligo Abbey, to Lough Gill, and to the Beach. Apparently it's not safe to swim there (this according to the signs posted everywhere), but nobody thinks twice about surfing. The giant board makes it OK!

Lough Gill. Apparently it's something to do with Yeats, but I'm pretty ignorant of Irish poetry. Also, I thought one of those swans was dead, and it was creeping me out, but it turned out to just be sleeping. Whew!

 

Monday we went to the Cliffs of Moher, aka the Cliffs of Insanity!!!! from The Princess Bride. Also where the creepy cave is that Dumbledore and Harry go to in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. We made many, many Princess Bride jokes while we were there. And we heard some young folks talking about Harry Potter. It was very whatever the movie version of literary is. I would have really liked to take a boat ride at the bottom of the Cliffs, because that would have felt even more authentic.

 You were supposed to be this great Colossus, and yet he gains! 

The big disappointment of the Cliffs of Moher (aside from not seeing the Dread Pirate Westley) was that we didn't see a single puffin. This is another reason a boat tour would have been great. Probably closer to the puffins. The best thing about the Cliffs of Moher (aside from the fact that they're cool) was that Niki and I ate really, really delicious peanut butter and banana sandwiches when we were there. Mmmm... Sandwiches...Also, there were a bunch of musicians randomly performing along the path to the Cliffs from the visitor center, which was really nifty.

School crossing sign. Is it just us, or are these children deformed? Taken in Lisdoonvarna, Ireland, on the way to the Cliffs of Moher.

 

After we left the Cliffs, we headed to my most favorite place in Ireland: Dingle!

To Be Continued...