Nothing cheerful, this time, I'm afraid

I was planning on writing something fun/funny/cool in this blog post. Like my trip to the Great Dismal Swamp with Maren and Dave, or Disney on Ice, or my cute new glasses. But unfortunately, I'm not feeling it today. I am feeling really down, and I need to share.

This has been, without a doubt, the worst year of my short life. Not all of it has been horrible, but I have cried more and felt more miserable this year than any other time I remember. And I can remember some crap times. But nothing on this level. Every time I feel like things are starting to go better, at Church, or at my apartment, it all comes crashing back down. And I can pretty much blame it all on one person (and my job). I'm so tired of hating her, and feeling inappropriate feelings of rage, but she does not make it easy. In fact, she makes it nigh unto impossible. I sense that, years from now, when I have moved on to something bigger, better, and more fabulous, I will be able to look back and feel pity for this person, who so obviously sucks. At the general RS meeting this week, there was a lot about charity, and i kept thinking I needed to develop more charity, esp. towards this person. But once again I am failing. I don't even want charity right now. I just want to hurt her. I hate that I'm feeling this way. It's so frustrating that she's not only making me miserable, but that she's also making me sin. How rude!

I don't know exactly why I'm posting, but it is a blog about my life, even the ugly aspects. Everyone, pray for me please. I could really, really use it right now.

If Home is Where the Heart is, Then Your Real Home's in Your Chest

As evidenced by the title of this post, I have been a wee bit homesick lately. It's a real kick in the pants. I feel like Bilbo Baggins: "I want to see mountains, Gandalf, mountains!" But today, something happened that made me feel slightly better. I checked out a book at the library, and the due date is October 1!!!!! That's right, mes amis, the best (for obvious reasons) month of the year is almost here! In a month!

This means several things.
1) I can start decorating for Halloween soon! I'm thinking tomorrow.
2) It's almost my birthday! Start saving your pennies, shoppers!
3) The weather has been cool and should (theoretically) remain that way!
3a) Sweater weather!
4) Fall TV season starts next week!
-4b) I don't have any TV, so I have to watch everything online, on my increasingly slow laptop. Boo!

Okay, so that last one is lame. And even the good ones don't completely combat the feeling of ennui. But, I am attempting to harness the power of positive thinking. So, you will get only smiles from me! And brief, bitter asides.