I was planning on writing something fun/funny/cool in this blog post. Like my trip to the Great Dismal Swamp with Maren and Dave, or Disney on Ice, or my cute new glasses. But unfortunately, I'm not feeling it today. I am feeling really down, and I need to share.
This has been, without a doubt, the worst year of my short life. Not all of it has been horrible, but I have cried more and felt more miserable this year than any other time I remember. And I can remember some crap times. But nothing on this level. Every time I feel like things are starting to go better, at Church, or at my apartment, it all comes crashing back down. And I can pretty much blame it all on one person (and my job). I'm so tired of hating her, and feeling inappropriate feelings of rage, but she does not make it easy. In fact, she makes it nigh unto impossible. I sense that, years from now, when I have moved on to something bigger, better, and more fabulous, I will be able to look back and feel pity for this person, who so obviously sucks. At the general RS meeting this week, there was a lot about charity, and i kept thinking I needed to develop more charity, esp. towards this person. But once again I am failing. I don't even want charity right now. I just want to hurt her. I hate that I'm feeling this way. It's so frustrating that she's not only making me miserable, but that she's also making me sin. How rude!
I don't know exactly why I'm posting, but it is a blog about my life, even the ugly aspects. Everyone, pray for me please. I could really, really use it right now.
4 comments:
Mer - Keep your chin up. I agree with Missy that you just need to emphasized everything that you do that is positive for the library. I have unfortunately worked with many people who are exactly like the spawn of Voldemort. I made it through and I know you will as well. You just need to show her who is the bigger person. Power to the people who will not be used as a doormat.
Meredith, you are awesome. Mr. and Mrs. Voldemort are fools, and of course evil. You are a great librarian. You help make my experience at the library more fulfilling, and you don't even work at my library. What!
I know this is way late but I wanted to let you know that I think your awesome and smart and evil lady obviously is an idiot. Can't wait to see you!
I love you, Mer, and I am completely amazed by your good heart.
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